06.30.2009  
 
Editor's Note

A beautiful cruise ship bartender.

Responsible Cruising

By paul motter

The death of Michael Jackson highlights the dangers of prescription drugs. When going on cruises please leave your prescriptions in their original marked bottles. Not only is it safer for you and especially others, it is also the law when carrying prescriptions overseas. Also remember to consider how your meds might not mix with alcohol.

When it comes to drinking while on a cruise, you are there to have fun, but just because you are on a cruise it doesn't mean you have to drink the entire time. You will actually enjoy the cruise more if you drink less and retire early. You will be more alert for the ports of call and you will remember more of your vacation.

Late at night the main activities onboard are dancing, gambling and shows. I don't need to tell you how badly drinking and gambling go together. For example, if the dealer gives you a blackjack, and you want to split your aces - you are seeing double. When everyone in the casino is counting how many chips you have left and your dealer only smiles when you lose, you have probably overstayed your welcome.

Women always look great dancing no matter what, but men look best when dancing within a realm of dignity. If you can't resist doing every 60s dance fad from the "Batman" to the "Swim" you probably had too much to drink. You can be certain of it if the DJ plays Olivia Newton John's "Let's Get Physical" and you make your necktie into a headband and start shadow boxing.

At the stage shows, if you think you are heckling the comedian and it is actually the captain making a special announcement, you have had too much to drink. If you keep trying your room keycard with no green light and finally someone opens the door and asks "what do you want?" and you answer, "What do I want? What are you doing in my room?" then you definitely had too much to drink. And when you think $10/minute isn't too much to use the ship's phone to call your all of your "really good friends" at 3:00 in the morning, but your last phone call is to 911 because you "need a tattoo removal right now," then you might start thinking about A.A.

In our opinion, there is no reason to get too drunk on cruises, which means sneaking alcohol onboard just for the purpose of getting even more drunk is not only against the rules, it is detrimental to your health. Stick to what you can afford to spend at the bars onboard. Drinking less means more money for shore excursions and you gain less weight. Isn't it better to come home looking fit and telling people all the great stuff you did than it is to come home and say "Well, I don't remember much, but I must have eaten well."


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