My Wife myself and my 3 children (Ages 15,8,8) sailed on the
Victoria April 13 for a 7 day cruise to the Eastern Caribbean. My
wife and I previously sailed on the Costa Carla C 22 years ago and
had high expectations for this cruise, our children's first.
Costa circa 1980: Let me first tell you that our cruise aboard
the Carla C was incredible! The food was beyond gourmet, the
service impeccable.....we truly felt like royalty. Naturally we
figured that it could only get better. Boy were we
wrong!!!.....what happened to the Costa of 20 years ago? Read on if
you wish to find out!
Embarkation: was average. Port Everglades is in a very bad
section of Florida so hold on to your purse and wallet! My wife's
was stolen the morning before the cruise in Ft. Lauderdale. It was
a little harder for us to board the ship because all of her ID was
in her purse. After 2 hours in a detention room and many tears, we
were finally able to board the ship but my wife swears someone
followed her around secretly for the entire cruise. Security
was very tight....and that didn't bother me the least bit.
We're OFF: Once on the ship, we went to the buffet on deck 11
rear. It was barely average. Nothing unusual, nothing spectacular,
nothing to write home about, and it was the same everyday.....
basically pretty boring. The help at the buffet was courteous but
half of them didn't understand a word of English, which brings me
to another point...English was definitely the minority language on
this cruise, both passengers and crew. If you're into ignorant
Western Europeans who like to sun topless around the kiddy pool
exposing their hairy legs and armpits and who prefer the smell of
their BO to Calvin Klein, this is the cruise for you! All
announcements were in at least 5 languages and English was not the
first. We were told by the crew that there were 2300 passengers on
the boat, which was over the 1900 limit.....unsafe and overcrowded.
If you did not get a lounge chair by 9:00 am, forget it!
The Ship: simply beautiful!!! Immaculately clean, abundant with
rare marble and expensive mosaics. The public rooms were large,
albeit overcrowded. This ship must have cost a fortune. I have been
on other cruises and this was one of the most beautifully designed
ships I have ever seen. Someone was always cleaning something 24
hours a day. One day in port they even painted the anchor after it
got dirty from anchoring in Catalina Island the day prior. On the
negative side the arcade is in the middle of the casino and kids
aren't allowed in the casino, so you had to covertly sneak them in
to the arcade. Also the A/C in the public areas was inadequate and
many of our non-deodorant using shipmates stunk to high heaven. I
always knew when my elevator mates were non-American.
The Food: The food was just average. My prime rib, the first
night's dinner was like a steak'um with gravy...gravy on prime
rib....Classy!!! The pasta was always excellent. The coffee was
great. The food presentation was on par with Shoneys/Eat'n Park.
Gourmet is not a word in Costa 's dictionary. Even the salads were
boring. The midnight and dessert buffets were spectacular like they
were sculpted from shiny plastic...just how they tasted. Looks
aren't everything. They bragged that there were 150 different
people from 60 different countries in the kitchen staff...you know
what they say about too many cooks in the kitchen. The morning
buffets were the same soggy scrambled eggs, cereal and other items
that you would typically find on a very skimpy Sunday brunch not
equal to Shoneys or Eat'n Park. Even the orange juice was watered
down. One morning I asked for an omelet and got the dirtiest look
from the man behind the counter that I said "Never mind". The next
morning I got up the courage to wait for an omelet and what I got
was an overcooked taco shell. Average drinks ran from 4-8 dollars
each. Our waiter and busboy were wonderful and they were extremely
happy that we were Americans. Tipping on Costa is cash only and
they told us the Europeans never leave a tip and since their salary
is a measly $50 per month, their tips were their income. Along with
our cabin steward they were the nicest people on the ship.
The Itinerary and Ports of Call: The itinerary was great but the
time spent at the ports of call was too short. by the time you got
off the boat you had to rush to get back on. Although, if you took
a paid excursion, you were allowed to leave first and come back
last. I would like to elaborate more on these exotic ports but was
too rushed to enjoy them. They even had the nerve to dump us in the
Dominican Republic one evening at dusk. I don't know about you but
the last place I want to be at 1:30am is in the streets of Puerto
Rico. I did enjoy St. Thomas and Nassau which we left
mid-afternoon.
The Activities: The kid programs were very crowded and I ran
into the ship's fairy princess at a market in the Bahamas and she
told me most of them are bogus and they are geared to make you buy
unlimited drink passes that are not unlimited. She said everything
is geared to spending lots of money. Management was rude and they,
the non-Italian employees, were underpaid. My teen daughter tried
the disco but was propositioned by the many non-American boys that
wanted to party or as they said "pawty" with her (whatever that
means). I must admit there was always something going on somewhere
and if you were bored, it was by your own choosing. The deck
activities were generally fun, but the constant announcements in at
least 5 languages kind of zapped some of the energy from the deck
activities. The on board entertainment was on par with other
cruises, magic, comedy, dancing and singing. The Cruise Director
Peter was an "idiot". Come on Costa , you can do better. I figured
he got the job because he was related to some VP at Costa . His
favorite phrase was "Chow for now". I figured he was referring to
the dog chow we had for the midnight buffet that was left over from
dinner earlier.
The Staff: Most of the executive staff was Italian. I was told
by a Slovak casino employee that the Italians get all of the good
jobs. Don't get me wrong, I'm Italian American and proud of it. I
only saw the Captain once when he was introduced at a show night.
He was probably too scared to show his face in public areas because
of the large number of disgruntled crowded passengers that wanted a
piece of him. The Italian staff members were generally indifferent
and not very helpful. An employee explained to me that it was the
last Caribbean sailing and they were tired and just wanted to go
home. The international staff was generally pleasant. They nodded a
lot and smiled...most of them had no clue what I was saying to
them. When I inquired on the final day to a young lady in a white
uniform as to why the photo place was closed when it was supposed
to be opened she kept telling me that orange luggage tags go to the
plaza. I finally told her she had no idea what I was saying and
that she was "nothing but a total moron". She gave me a bright
smile, nodded and said "yes".
Summary: On the final morning, Stefano, the ship's manager, made
everything crystal clear. When I was doing my daily security check
in because of my wife's untimely purse snatching and ID loss, I
arrived with one of my children at breakfast at 7:02 am. I was told
by the man at the door to the Fantasia restaurant that I could not
go in. When I explained that I just wanted to join the rest of my
family, he still resisted. I had an FRS radio and was talking to my
family inside the restaurant. Finally the Maitre de who I
regretfully tipped the night before told me in a very rude tone
that my family had not shown up for breakfast then closed the door.
I went to the info desk and demanded to speak to the captain of the
ship. I was quickly ushered into Stefano's office. He told me he
was in charge of the entire ship. When I complained to him about
the treatment and my total disappointment with Costa when compared
to my previous Costa experience, he summed it up like this. He
asked me what I paid for my last Costa cruise which was by far much
more expensive than our vacation aboard the Victoria. He then
indicated that you get what you pay for and they have to cut
corners to keep the cost down. Sorry, I didn't know that. I've been
on less expensive cruises (Carnival for one, but they own Costa )
and have had a great time with great food and service.
Sorry Costa , I'll never be back...."Chow for EVER" Peter and
Costa ..........